Post A' Levels

It's really been awhile since I last blogged, and it feels good to be writing again, because it only means one thing, FREEDOM, ALAS! JC 2 has been one hectic year, with so much ups and down for me personally. Okay, actually lots of downs. I'm glad I'm now free to go out on weekends, free to do whatever I want, free to actually consider what I want to do in future! This post had been on my mind for a long time, wanting to write about how I felt throughout Year 2.

Year 2 of JC life, 2014. It felt so shitty at the start. My friends I've had in school graduated, so it felt really lonely. Faces that were familiar in school weren't there anymore, instead replaced by people whom I don't know, or hardly know. Although my classmates from Year 1 were still with me, but I just felt distanced since I didn't really interact much with them last year. School was hateful, so damn hateful. I guess this hate caused me to feel really negative, so much so I wanted to quickly get out of school fast. Sometimes I really regret not studying hard enough, so I didn't had to go through 2014 still in JC2. But at the end of the day, I've got to endure. I keep telling myself, " Fuck this shit, I'm going to tank through this year, and I'm going back to where I belong."

Little did I know, with all the school events, CCA, and continuous studying, time really flies!

Orientation 2014 was really great because getting to become an OGL was definitely fun, and also to get to know the J1s better. But not to forget, getting to know the other OGLs in my group, to know my batch people better.

My Beloved OG/CG

CCA played a huge role in my year. It kept me looking forward to coming school. Being given the added responsibility of a leader definitely made me hone my leadership skills as well as being able to grow personally. I'm really glad to be given this opportunity. My teammates were an awesome bunch. Although I won't say they are skillful, but at least they are the people whom I'm glad to be able to lead and call my team. Their nonsense is what makes my day, every training. AND there's this one person, whom wanted me to graduate, well, a big fuck to you, I've graduated. It's a bitter-sweet 3 years. 

I used to study in school with my clique of friends, but since they've graduated, I've tried countless times to find people like them to study with.. Unfortunately, they can never be replaced. There's something really unique about them, which made me feel really comfortable around. Nonetheless, I'm thankful for those who sticked by me and studied in school with me:) <3 

Now that A's are over, I'm looking forward to the things upcoming! I've got a marathon, my second one, in 2 weeks time! Yet to train, but going to give my best shot! 42.195km, a matter of grit and will. I'll definitely push myself, to complete with a better timing. And also, NS is coming... :( 

I'm excited yet fearful, because that's the next phase of my life. 

Till the next blog, *fistbump* "balalalala" - Baymax, Big Hero 6. 

Perseverance is what I stand for

The Value of Perseverance

The idea of perseverance differs for many individuals. Firstly, let me define what is theoretically meant by perseverance: (got it off google) "persistence in doing something despite difficulty or delay in achieving success." 

Perseverance to me is the ability to endure the challenges, hardships and to never give up, in light of fighting for the goal you want to achieve. This value of perseverance came about when I was a kid, probably at the age of 7. Perseverance was one of the two core values in my Primary School, Kong Hwa Primary. (The other value being sincerity). I first realised its importance when I was with my mum, at 光明山（Kong Meng San Phor Kark See Monastry) during Vesak Day, where we were attending the 三步一拜event. My knees were bleeding because I scratched it against the road surface, but I wanted to complete it, so I decided not to let my mum know, or else she'd stopped me. The pain was excruciating... But to be able to receive the blessings from the monk at the end of the journey, I chose to endure, to persevere! When my mum saw my knees, she got so worried. However, as she was treating my wound, she said, "Your school really taught you well, the value of perseverance"

In my secondary school days, Basketball trainings were tough like... You've got to go through it to understand, I can't explain it using words. The thought of having to wake up on early Saturday morning, running up and down the stairs~
Coach: "今天跑十圈楼梯!"
Me (thoughts): "Are you f***ing kidding me?!?!"
As much as I wanted to tell him that... I dare not defy his orders, so, persevere on! Especially since my teammates are doing the exact same thing, I've got no excuse.

Anglican High School Basketball 08'

The feeling after training, heavenly! I can just sit at the stadium for an hour or so before leaving. Till today, I've never experienced that kind of feeling from trainings. I really miss those days! 

Coming into SR, the running culture made me strengthen my value of perseverance. To those who may not know, I hated running back in secondary school! The process of running, till today I still agree, sucks! But!!! The end result is the sweetest! Each time I managed to run the same distance within a shorter time, I felt that sense of accomplishment, AND THE REASON IS, I PERSEVERED,  despite being fatigued.

This value is the reason why I managed to complete my Standard Chartered Marathon last year! 

Side track: My marathon experience

December 1st, 2013, 3:30 am was the time I woke up... Who on earth wakes up at such crazy time? Me,  and those running the marathon. I went for the Marathon without much training, though many people advised me to train! My mindset was that since I managed to complete 21km, I would be able to complete a Marathon. Yeah, it's pretty damn screwed up mindset. To those who have the same thought, NEVER think like that. I had a goal, to complete it within 4 hours and 15mins, but not much training, it was just a hopeless aim.I started off my marathon with my friend, Ben, (who somehow eventually completed the run! I called him up after I reached home, had lunch and preparing to sleep.)

Me: "Hello Ben, where are you now?

Ben: Still running... The safety cars are like behind me. I can count the number of runners behind, about 20, and I met a new friend"

Me: "Seriously... It's 1:15pm and you are still running!! 8 hours plus already" 

However, salute to him for completing the run!

During the run, I did something really hilarious! The volunteers were giving out muscle rub at the 18km mark. Before the race, I saw on the map, there was energy gel at the 18km mark also! So you could guess.. I took the muscle rub, thinking it was energy gel, and placed it in my mouth. I ran back to the volunteers right at that instance!! As I approached, I heard:

Volunteers: "Oh my god, that guy f***ing stupid, eat the muscle rub!" 

Okayyyy... What a douche.. Nevertheless, he helped me, gave me water to gurgle. Fortunately or not, I felt so awake, because my tongue was burning~ 

I JUST NEED TO CARRY ON! 

For 26km, it was comfortable pace, and I could have achieved my goal! My 21km mark timing: 1 hour 45mins 

Once I past the 26km mark, my calf muscle tensed up... cramps.... urghhhhhh!!! First being stupid, now being helpless.. It was really severe cramp, I lay down on the road, and fortunately, people wearing superhero costumes helped me: Zorro and Batman. Really embarrassed, and participants even stopped to take photo of them helping me -.- I swear never in my life have I felt so helpless.. I regretted not taking the advice of having to train for my marathon. For the next 10km, each time I tried to run, the cramps will return, so I had no choice, but to walk, and just persevere on! This mantra ran through my head, whenever I wanted to just sit down and give up, "Perseverance is what I stand for" 

Eventually, I managed to run to the finish line, but the timing was so off my goal.. During the walk, I saw senior citizens running faster than me, yet I could not do anything about it... Sucks!! Nonetheless, I completed 42.195km, within 4 hours, 55mins 37secs. It was really about perseverance, and to push on despite the obstacles ahead. 

Through these experiences, I realise that having the value of perseverance helped me alongside my studies, and other goals that I would like to achieve! As long as you do not give up, nothing is impossible, and I strongly believe in this, (as egoistic as it may sound) I've got no limits. That's because I'm one stubborn kid, who has never once let obstacles get the better of me.  

Perseverance is what I stand for

The Work Towards Our Goals

"“It is good to have an end to journey toward; but it is the journey that matters, in the end.” 
― Ernest Hemingway"

Finally, my Basketball "career" has come to an end. Well, truth be told, there is a mixed feeling now that CCA is out of the equation towards my main goal, A' levels. What we set out to achieve initally, as a team of 12 players, 2nd round in the A'Division. For 4 consecutive games, we were defeated... but we still have one final game, which may also be my final game, against TPJC. We knew it was our only chance to redeem ourselves.

"WE HAVE NOTHING TO LOSE, BUT EVERYTHING TO PROVE"

These were the words I told the team before going into the game. Determination to achieve our goal, coupled with our teamwork, helped us grind out a victory, winning 34-31! The feeling of winning was, GOOOOOOOD!!! 超爽！！！ The last time I won in a SR jersey was the first game I've ever played in A'Div, how coincidental to win in my last game. What happened in between? Well, credits to Miss R:) 

All in all, though we did not achieve what we wanted, the smile, joy and laughter on and off court made this journey memorable. Thank you guys!

 Serangoon Junior College Basketball Team 2014

Back to my topic, my perception of goals~ 

Whenever I set to achieve something, I would work towards it. Recently, I managed to break my own personal best again, 2.4km---8mins 28secs. This has been one on my list of things to accomplish, to beat my own timing! In my point of view, everyone has a reason as to why they would want to achieve their goals. As for me, it's simple, it is for the person who has inspired me! However, achieving this goal of mine has not brought me much happiness, oddly.. Comparisons are always made, and there will be people out there commenting. I believe in actions, not words

On a side note, I believe in KARMA! Day after A'Div and NAPFA test, I sprained my ankle-.- First time I've ever sprained it. Guess it's a sign to go study! 

Lastly, working towards MYES! Though I've no goals yet... which is bad, I want to do well! These few days, many things have been running through my mind. How I wish I could go back in time, to last year. I'd always enjoy the accompaniment of Jason, Vivian and Zhan Chun, sitting together on the same bench, studying together~  If only I had not been an SP... If only I had graduated last year. I would have enlisted by now, I wouldn't have to go through this year... I miss last year. 

Perseverance is what I stand for

WillRun2014

My passion for running has only started when I first came into SRJC! Back in Secondary school days, I've never liked running. I only run whenever there is 2.4km test. WillRun was the first time I've ever ran my first long distance run. In my heart when I first heard 10km, my reaction: "siao uh? I walk can or not?"

 2 years have passed, this being my 3rd year running WillRun, my reaction has changed. Now: "My target is 17km this year". I'd say the school culture has changed me. However, the biggest change was due to the inspiration I got from my first year Basketball coach, Zac. The day he left us, was the day WillRun ended. Quite sentimental of me, but it made this event even more special! He inspired me to run, when he managed to complete a marathon(42.195km) under 3 hours. To complete in 3 hours, it practically means you are running less than 45minutes for 10km on average! It was crazy...

 Anyway, back to my topic, my reason for aiming 17km was because I wanted to be the first! I've never had the experience of being first, and knowing that I've schoolmates who managed to run 16km within 1hour and 15mins, the targetted distance became clear to me.
Friends: "what's the distance you are aiming for?"
 Me: "17km:"
Friends: "WOAH! You really siao!"
In my heart, I was thinking, I've never said I was normal:)

 26 April, 2014, WillRun2014. Target: 17km. The night before, I keep telling myself to sleep early.. In the end, slept at 1am, woke up, LATE!! Didn't mentally prepare myself, but I was hoping it would not be like the previous year. Last year WillRun was disappointing, because of the weather.. Bloody hot uh!!! As a result, I only ran 14km. Coming into this year's run, I was hoping the weather would be kind to me.

As I enter the school, I was looking around:
Weather(checked)
Atmosphere(checked)
Mental preparedness(unchecked)

 Reason being, I knew it was going to be a hot day... The atmosphere was good! I saw all the guys cheering so enthusiastically for the girls running, be it their classmates, CCA mates or even orientation mates! In a way, the kind of spirit of supporting for your friends really make this run such a special one! The class of guys opposite where I was located were literally damn high! A bit retarded also uh, who the heck sings the school song while cheering... 845am, all the guys made their way to the starting point and did the mandatory stretching before running, and me as usual, will always want to be in the front. My entire CCA filled up the starting line, and they knowing I wanted to be first, jokingly said: "later I help you block the way"
Tsk tsk... so bad!

                                                Basketballers filling up the entire starting line!

 "BLAARRRREEEE", POOF, OFF WE GO!
For the first time I'm running in the front with so many people at the back, I felt pressured! But I just kept a consistent pace throughout! Big thanks to all those who cheered for me throughout the run! Every single time, I will try to acknowledge with a thumbs up! It's this kind of atmosphere where I felt pumped up and encouraged to push the extra mile. It was the encouragement that pushed me through during my 10km mark, where I felt like giving up.. The heat was burning, I was running out of strength and my goal felt too far... My motivation, it was fading away. That surge of feeling to give up was strong, but I kept this 3 words in my head, as though I was chanting a mantra. Mind Over Matter.

 I expected the heat to affect me, so I decided to push on, and ignore it. My body started to feel more invigorated, and I was pushing for my target! 12km completed in: 3mins 50s, madness. I pushed around that pace till I finally completed 16km, the mark of the top. With 4mins left on the clock, I was too lazy and tired, the sole on my feet, burning.. My body, burning. Should I push?? "Nahhhh..." And I decided to stop. A bit of a regret now, but overall, the run was a great one! (would be better if the weather is kinder) This would probably be the last run till A's are over! Till my next race~ Mind over matter.
Shall end it with the photos I've taken after crossing the finishing line and completing the run!

My personal photographers:)

Small girl (Po)

*black moon emoji* Good job on completing your run!

My basketballers! <3

4 Indians

9/10 shots of stupid actions, excluding the last because it's vulgar!

You who I always irritate!

 

Pek! Fated classmates

My alliance~

Perseverance is what I stand for